M-Audio. BurgerKing drive-thru. BurgerKing Delayer (BKD). No mushrooms. Hotness escalation. Sufficient degree of hotness. Fake penis scam. Urine samples. Penis voxels. Penis jar. Jack-Russel terrier. Breaking wind. Shutting off computers. Benjamin Franklin. School farting incidents. Faux Thanksgiving cooking tips. The Valentine Nebraska Butt Bandit. Presumed white. Buttprint sentencing guidelines. Full-taint press. America’s fattest city. Hot dog festival. Fat town renaissance fair. Paul Revere. American history. Analog CD-ROMs. Digital Equipment Corporation. VAX. Report cards. High-school freak fatal accidents. Volunteer EMTs. Unscrewed gas jets.